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SAP HANA – Chuck Norris of Enterprise Software?

It has been intensive week (just like the week before, and before, and before). But now weekend is coming! So, let’s have some fun… Small joke will not kill anyone (but remember, Chuck Norris can).

There is a lot of buzz about SAP HANA recently, fueled by successful series of SAP Runs Better Tour (#SAPRBT), and as a result – many articles, tweets, blogs by analysts and mentions by casual folks, like me.

Vijay once asked in his SCN blog, HANA – Can the new Sheriff in town undo some of the horrors?. Well, Sherrif – may be not, but Ranger – for sure. Reading all the recent facts about SAP HANA, I could not resist not to remind famous Chuck Norris Facts. Read some here, compare to HANA and you will agree – we did get new Ranger in town 🙂

  • There are two types of humans in the world: people who are slow, and Chuck Norris
  • Chuck Norris can watch 60 minutes TV episode in 22 seconds
  • Chuck Norris got his drivers license at the age of 16. Seconds
  • Chuck Norris can divide by zero
  • Google won’t search for Chuck Norris because it knows: You don’t find Chuck Norris, he finds you
  • There is no Control button on Chuck Norris’ computer. Chuck Norris is always in control
  • When Chuck Norris is ready to wake up, he tells the sun to rise
  • Chuck Norris built a better mousetrap, but the world was too frightened to beat a path to his door
  • When you say “no one’s perfect”, Chuck Norris takes this as a personal insult

Happy weekend, everyone! And remember: Chuck Norris made Newton write 3 laws of physics just to break them… when he had a boring weekend.

-Vitaliy, aka @Sygyzmundovych


PS. If the weekend is over, or for any other reason you just want to have some more serious reading about SAP HANA, here is a list of my previously published blogs on the topic:

  1. Important Questions (with Answers) about SAP’s in-memory High-performance Analytic Appliance – HANA
  2. HANA 1.0 vs other SAP in-memory products
  3. SAP HANA: What it means for business and for your career
  4. Critical Success Factors for SAP HANA implementations
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  • @Sygyzmundovych,

    never been a big fan of Chuck Norris, but somehow, i think, HANA may be the best thing that has happened to HP in the recent years. if they don’t see it, Big Blue, hopefully, will.

    @greg_not_so from Lenovo T61

  • Hi Vitaliy,
    great blog. I’ve laughed a lot about this. And somehow it expresses some sentiment that I’ve been carrying around for some time as well, especially when I read all those official SAP statements on what kind of problems HANA will solve.
    Thanks for writing this. I’ve enjoyed it.